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About Mysterical-E.
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Mavis Tuttle enjoyed using people, often just because she could. She was very good at it, which explained why she had no friends. Her long-suffering marriage was one of convenience-that convenience being Henry Tuttle's money. She had succeeded in using Henry to the point that, except for his money, he had become totally, well…useless.

Like most other nights, after dinner Mavis found herself in the downstairs den idly playing Hearts on the computer and nursing a lukewarm Scotch and soda. With dinner over and conversation once again experiencing more moments of drawn out silence than words, Henry had quickly excused himself, gathered up his work files, and prepared to return to the office for another late night session. Even the small bouquet of white daisies he brought home that evening-Mavis' favorite flowers-hadn't been enough to change their after dinner routine.

The last two weeks of tax season were usually hectic, and the senior partners at the accounting firm, like Henry, found it necessary to put in overtime. But every year Henry looked forward to the late business hours. To remain in Mavis' presence meant certain ridicule. No one would blame him if he ever decided to leave her, but he never would. Mavis had succeeded in sucking the life out of him, much like the food dehydrator on the counter in the kitchen. Henry knew that he was no prize and he was sure that Mavis was the best mate he could expect in life. Ridicule was acceptable under those conditions. Loneliness wasn't.

He paused at the garage door long enough to rescue the bouquet of daisies from the garbage can where Mavis had unceremoniously disposed of them. It wasn't her fault. She had told him over and over how much she disliked surprises. He made a mental note to be more thoughtful next time.


"Goddamned pop-ups," Mavis hissed as she moved the cursor to delete yet another unwanted advertisement suddenly appearing on her computer screen. She clicked the mouse hard to remove several layers of offers for low interest loans, help in finding an old classmate, and ads for software to prevent pop-ups. She paused at the last layered ad offering to find your perfect partner.

Mavis lit a cigarette, leaned back in her chair and read the conditions listed on the pop-up. For a small fee a man or a woman could fill in a profile, select an anonymous screen name, submit profile information, and wait for the online service to provide a short list of compatible mates. A private chatroom would be assigned where Mavis, using her screen name, could interview any or all of the people that the service found to be compatible with her profile. If a successful match resulted, then the two anonymous people would be assigned individual ID numbers that could be used to access yet another private room-a cyberspace motel room-to accommodate their tryst.

Mavis was intrigued. What better place to use and abuse people than cyberspace? When they finally realized that they were being used, all she had to do was click the screen off. No raised voices. No nasty looks. Just a simple touch on the mouse key.

Another benefit to the cyberspace matchmaking was that Mavis could be anyone she wanted to be by simply altering a few details on her questionnaire. Her fingers began to dance across the keyboard as a sinister smile spread comfortably across her face.

"Likes walks on the beach at sunset. Enjoys long mornings in bed with that special man. Is content in a relationship only if he is happy. Feels her first obligation is to see to his every need. Screen name…Precious." She stopped to reread her answers and laughed. "What a load of crap," she said with a smirk.

A simple stretch of the truth was the same approach she had used to beguile an unsuspecting Henry years earlier. Though she had tried this approach a number of times before with other men, only Henry had been duped by her self-described 'load of crap.' The others had quickly seen through her sweetened façade and had recognized her for what she really was-a vicious personality that seemed to thrive on humiliating men merely for the sport of it all.

She lit another cigarette and watched the screen with growing anticipation. Suddenly, she was startled by the ringing of the phone. She answered and rolled her eyes. It was Henry.

"I…I'm sorry for the flowers tonight. I should have asked you first."
Again Mavis rolled her eyes.

"I just wanted to let you know that I'm stuck in traffic. It doesn't look like I'll get to the office for awhile."

"And just what does that all mean to me?" she asked in a disinterested tone.

"I…I just didn't want you to worry about me, that's all. Anyway, I'll be home late, so don't feel like you have to wait up. But if you'd like to wait-"

"It's been a long day, Henry. I'm tired. Try not to make as much noise as you did last night." She hung up the phone and reached for her cigarettes, miffed at the interruption, but amused that Henry actually thought she would be worried about him.

Suddenly, as promised there was a prompt on the screen that indicated her compatibility list was available. Within ten minutes the promised listing of her perfect mate had arrived. She smiled at the irony. She had looked for five years until she settled on Henry, and now an unsolicited pop-up ad on her computer screen had found not one, but five perfect mates in ten short minutes.

After another ten minutes of reviewing the details and reading posted comments of the five faceless potential mates, she narrowed her choices to two candidates-Viktor and Dirk. 'Dirk' sounded like the hero of a cheap romance novel, and 'Viktor' conjured up visions of a Baltic spy. Both sounded like worthy participants in the game she intended to play. She moved her cursor to Viktor's name and clicked the mouse button. The screen blinked and Viktor's ID number appeared next to the instructions on how to access the private chatroom. Without hesitation, Mavis typed in Viktor's ID and sat back, her heart pounding with anticipation. She didn't have long to wait.

"I am Viktor, and I am looking for a good woman."

Mavis was startled by such a blunt statement, but decided to remain in the chatroom nonetheless.

"Good evening, Viktor. I'm Precious. When you say you're looking for a 'good woman,' what do you want her to be good at?" She brought the back of her hand up to her mouth and snickered.

"What kind of a name is 'Precious?'"

Mavis sat back, a bit irritated that Viktor had ignored her question. She moved the cursor to the exit button and paused. She reread Viktor's two short posts-dull and simple. What was there to gain from trying to manipulate dull and simple? But instead of leaving the private room unfulfilled, she returned to the keyboard.

"Viktor, you didn't answer me. What do you mean by a 'good woman?'"

"I am alone in your country and am looking for a woman who is good. Are you that woman?"

Dull, simple, and Baltic. But definitely no spy. Mavis sat back and exhaled, sending a stream of smoke toward the computer screen. It was obvious that Viktor wasn't what she expected. Still, she had gone to a bit of trouble to get this far. There had to be a payoff before she let Viktor go.

"Viktor, where does your woman have to be good?"

"In the community…in the home…and in the Church," came Viktor's quick response.

"…and in bed?" Mavis chided.

"I don't know what you are trying to say. I am a God-fearing man looking for a good woman. Are you that woman?"

"Try me."

"In my home? At my Church? You would do this for me? You would meet with me? When can we meet?" Viktor asked.

Mavis could almost hear the excitement in Viktor's words.

"In your bed, Viktor. Try me in your bed. After all, I am Precious." Mavis was nearly in hysterics with this last post.

"What you ask should only be considered after we have known each other, after I know for sure that you are a good woman."

"Viktor, I am not a good woman. I am a GREAT woman. I am Precious. In your bed I can show you that great is better than good. I can show you that I am indeed Precious. Isn't the bedroom important in your country too?"

"You are moving too fast, Precious. It isn't like this in my country. We don't talk of such things when we first meet."

"What do you talk about, Viktor?"

Mavis found herself quickly tiring of Viktor's old world values. Without waiting for a response, she went into the kitchen and poured herself a fresh Scotch and soda. By the time she returned to the den and settled in front of the computer screen, Viktor had responded with a list of topics of conversation, none of which interested Mavis in the least.

"Viktor, wouldn't you enjoy touching a woman more than you would enjoy talking with her? Doesn't the thought of soft flesh excite you?"

"A good woman cannot be soft." Came Viktor's terse reply. "She must be strong…and she must be healthy…and she must make strong and healthy babies."

"But, Viktor, that's what I'm talking about." Mavis found her opening. "Doesn't that mean that a good woman has to be good in bed? Viktor, everything great in life starts in the bed."

Mavis waited several minutes before she tried again to draw Viktor further into her game. But before she could type her next comments, Viktor's reply appeared on her screen.

"Precious, I think you are not the one for me. You are not a good woman. I think I should go now."

Mavis could feel her chance slipping away. Her fingers danced across the keyboard.

"Viktor, you are right. I'm not good…I'm great. I am Precious. Don't you want to find out how precious I am?"

Mavis concentrated on the computer screen through a thin veil of smoke, but there were no further posts from Viktor. Several of her subsequent posts also went unanswered. Bored with how easy Viktor had been to fluster, she returned to the screen print of the five original candidates.

She thought about trying the other three candidates, but quickly dismissed the idea. Aside from Dirk, the other three were Martin, Fred, and John. What excitement could a poster possibly bring into her life when he didn't even have the creative sense to choose a more exotic screen name? She moved the cursor to Dirk's name and clicked.

Having selected Dirk, Mavis waited impatiently for the service to assign ID numbers. Once assigned the numbers, they could then enjoy the privacy of their own motel room in cyberspace. Her heart pounded with excitement. Viktor had been too easy. She hadn't expected him to be so blunt…so naïve. She had intended to toy with him much longer…bring him to a slow excited boiling point, and then let him drop. She was irritated with herself for losing him so quickly and felt strangely unfulfilled. She wouldn't make the same mistake with Dirk. She would see how he responded to the slow tease before she moved on to lustful suggestions, and ultimately to unbridled passion. The night had promise. Had she found the perfect mark? She didn't have long to wait.

"Precious, are you there?"

The words suddenly appeared on her screen. Her fingers trembled with anticipation. Mavis looked around, almost embarrassed, and then she began to type.

"Yes, Dirk. Precious is here."


The night grew late and the conversation grew more intimate. Mavis looked at her watch. It was almost midnight. She stepped out into the foyer and looked toward the top of the stairs. The rest of the house was dark. Henry might be home at any minute. She didn't feel like answering any of his questions about her night and grimaced at the thought that he might actually make an attempt at intimacy if he found her still awake. However, she was enjoying her time with Dirk. He had become putty in her hands. If she hadn't been so disappointed with her failure to arouse Viktor, she might have stopped there with Dirk. But she wasn't ready to stop. She looked at her watch again and bit her thumbnail. Stop or continue. Get into bed and avoid Henry's limp advances, or be awake when he came home and lay back once again and pretend. And then the phone rang.

"Mavis, it's Henry. I just wanted you to know that I'll be working a little later than I planned tonight. I'm afraid it took me longer to get into the office than I planned. It wouldn't look good to the other partners if I left before them."

Mavis could hear the boring clickety-clack of calculator keyboards and the idle chatter of a roomful of accountants cloned from mediocrity in the background. Normally this intrusion would have been unwanted, but Mavis found herself relieved and excited-relieved that Henry's advances would be put off yet another night, and excited to know that her time toying with Dirk was not over.

"Fine, Henry. Fine. You do what you have to. Don't wake me." With that brief message delivered, she hung up the phone and returned to the computer. With fingers raised above the keyboard, she was startled when the phone rang again.

"Mavis, it's Henry again. Mavis, I just want you to know that I'm sorry for these late nights. I'll make it up to you…I promise. I hope you miss me as much as I miss you." Henry's voice trailed off into silence. After a few seconds he whispered his goodbye.

Mavis stared at the receiver in her hand. She hated it when Henry tried to coax a romantic comment from her that way. She always felt that she was being tested in some way, and she didn't like it.

Henry's call cast a momentary shadow on her mood. Briefly, she thought of ending the on-line session and going to bed. And then the screen was filled with line after line of searching pleas from Dirk.

"Precious? Precious, are you still there? Precious, please answer me. I need to tell you something. Precious, please don't leave me."

Mavis moved the cursor up to close out the screen. It was late and she wasn't sure where her game with Dirk was heading. Suddenly, Dirk posted again.

"Precious, I think we have something special… something I think you feel too. That's why I must tell you now…Precious, I'm married."

When she first read the words, Mavis was angry. Was it possible that someone had turned the tables on her? Used her? And then she thought about Dirk's confession and smiled. The game had just become a lot more interesting. Her fingers returned to the keyboard.

"Dirk…sadly I too am married."

It was a calculated risk, but one that would propel her game to a new level. She watched the screen for several long silent minutes before Dirk replied.

"Why be sad, Precious? Can't two people share even stolen moments of happiness? Please, Precious, don't go."

Mavis lit another cigarette, tilted her head back, exhaled slowly and watched the smoke disappear as it floated toward the ceiling. She did this several more times before she turned back to the screen. No sense in appearing too anxious. Patience was a virtue, but it was also the most important rule of her game. She began to type.

"Dirk, I won't go. I know it's wrong, but I don't want to go…"

She loved the three dots. They seemed so dramatic, so Scarlett O'Hara.


For the next two hours Mavis and her cybermate exchanged sad stories of loneliness and emotional abandonment. Mavis complained of her husband's womanizing and physical abuse, neither of which remotely pertained to Henry. Dirk spoke of a domineering wife who expected him to attend to her every need. Her open flirtations with other men convinced Dirk that she has had more than one affair. But through all of her infidelities, he has yet to find the strength to leave her.

"I know I should have left her long ago. But until tonight, I didn't realize how good I could feel. Precious, you make me feel alive again."

Mavis was quite pleased with herself. It was evident that Dirk believed everything she had offered. But things were moving too quickly-moving much faster than her mind could scheme. She realized that her mistake with Viktor had changed the way she played the game with Dirk. Dirk had become her perfect victim, but suddenly that wasn't enough. She needed time to consider the game.

"Can we meet again…here…tomorrow night?"

She had barely clicked the 'Enter' key when Dirk's response appeared.

"I'll be waiting."

Mavis started to sign off of the private room screen, paused and typed a closing comment.

"Precious sends her love."


The conversation at the dinner table with Henry the following evening was sporadic and strained. Though Henry was apologetic throughout the meal, both seemed anxious to part from the other's company. When the grandfather clock in the foyer chimed half past nine, Henry folded his napkin, placed it on the empty plate in front of him, and once again gathered up his papers for a night of work at his downtown office. At the door he paused and turned to Mavis.

"If you'd prefer, I could call the other partners and tell them not to expect me tonight. Perhaps then we could-"

"Go on, Henry. Do whatever it is you do best." Mavis dismissed his overture with the wave of her hand clasped around a Scotch and soda. "I'm tired tonight anyway. I think I'll read for a bit before…before turning the lights out." She reached for her cigarette case and disappeared into the downstairs den.

Henry turned toward the door and hesitated. He stepped toward the den door just as Mavis closed it behind her. He teetered several minutes in the hallway, wanting so much to be the man he knew he wasn't. Slowly, he turned and walked out the front door headed for another night of calculator keyboards, accountant banter, and a cold bed, unaware that his wife was at that moment hovering over a keyboard waiting for her cyberspace lover.

Mavis waited until the tenth chime before she was sure that Henry wouldn't
return unexpectedly. Quickly, she entered her ID number and accessed the private room. She hoped that Dirk was waiting there for her. She didn't have long to wait for her answer.

"Precious, is that you? I was worried that you wouldn't come. I'm sorry that I'm late."

So Dirk was late as well. Good. She could use that. She began to type.

"I was beginning to wonder if last night meant nothing to you."

Mavis stifled the urge to laugh.

"I've been waiting here for you, afraid to come into our room, but more afraid to leave."

She bit her lower lip, but didn't deny herself a muted chuckle as she continued to type.

"But here we are and I am happy again…happy to be here…with you…alone." Scarlett would have been proud.


For the next two hours the conversation slowly progressed from sympathetic, to romantic, and finally to passionate. Mavis was very careful not to make the same mistake she made with Viktor. Slow but sure would make the game exciting and successful. When Mavis was convinced that Dirk was smitten with her charms, she decided to elevate the game just before signing out of the private room. She wasn't sure just where the game was headed, but she was willing to test new boundaries with Dirk. He was proving to be so willing and she was proving to be so capable.

"Dirk, have you been thinking, as I have, about how different our lives would have been had we met years ago?"

She didn't wait for Dirk's reply. Instead, she signed off, but not before sending one more message.

"Precious sends her love."


The following night, Henry didn't even bother to come home for dinner. Mavis picked at a small fruit salad and waited for the grandfather clock to chime the ninth hour. Before the seventh chime was complete, she had logged into the private room.

"Dirk, my darling, Precious is here."

"Where have you been?" came Dirk's quick reply. "You left me with that thought I've carried around all day! I feel like a schoolboy again. What did you mean, Precious? Can there ever be an 'us?'"

Mavis recognized the desperation in Dirk's words. The game was moving along now well under her control. But she had toyed with Dirk long enough. It was time for the game to move to the ultimate level-a level that even she was unsure of. And then…the phone rang.

"Mavis, it's Henry. I just wanted to say-"

"Not now, Henry!" Mavis screamed before slamming the receiver down.

Mavis straightened herself in the chair and composed her next post carefully.
"Dirk, my darling, there can never be an 'us' while we are both still married. Divorce will take too long. I can't wait. It must be now…or it can never be."

"But, Precious. What you are suggesting is…murder."

Mavis was absolutely beside herself with satisfaction. She hadn't been sure just where the game had turned or what the ultimate level would be, until Dirk himself had suggested murder. The game had reached a pinnacle-a point of truth or dare. But she was having too much fun and didn't want the game to end just yet. Though murder was never the ultimate level, and was certainly out of the question in Mavis' mind, there might still be at least one more chance to take Dirk higher and enjoy the moment that he fell that much further. Before she exited the private room she left her feigned reassurance.

"Precious sends her love."


When Mavis arrived home from shopping the next evening, she found the garage empty. Ironically, Henry's absence was becoming a comfort. Other wives might have suspected infidelity. But not Mavis. The mere thought of another woman finding Henry attractive was laughable.

Not bothering about dinner, Mavis fixed a Scotch and soda and settled down in the den. She sipped her drink and contemplated the rest of the evening while she sat staring at the darkened computer screen. When the monitor brightened, so did her mood. A few quick keystrokes brought her to the private room. Dirk was waiting for her.

"Precious, it's Dirk. I've been thinking about last night."

There were uncharacteristically long pauses between Dirk's posts.

"Tell me what to do."

Mavis was confused. What was Dirk asking? Could he honestly be considering murder? This was better than she had ever anticipated. She had actually driven Dirk to contemplate murder! What a shock. What a rush. But she had to be careful. The game had to slow down. She had to think.

"What do you mean, my darling?"

After several tense minutes, Dirk responded.

"Tell me how to murder my wife."

Mavis felt a rush of excitement warm her body. She reached for the Scotch and soda and finished the drink in two large swallows. She paused and started typing slowly, carefully selecting each letter.

"You'll have to make it look like a random crime. Maybe make it look like your wife surprised a burglar."

Mavis surprised herself with the ease with which she planned someone's murder. She had fantasized about Henry's death hundreds of times, but never thought she could plan the death of a total stranger so easily.

"But what about your husband?"

"What do you mean?"

"How will you murder your husband?"

Mavis sat back in her chair. She hadn't considered this part of the game. Since she intended to break off the cyberspace romance now that she had reached the ultimate level of manipulating someone to the point of murder, actually planning Henry's death with someone else had never occurred to her.

"I'll take care of it, my darling. Be strong. We will be together soon."

Mavis sat back and read the last line. She needed some time to figure out how to end this charade and to disappear quickly, leaving a confused and heartbroken Dirk behind to live out his life with the woman he planned to murder.

Her finger paused over the 'Enter' button. Something was missing-something special. And then she smiled.

"Dirk, my darling, I want to be with you when she dies."

Mavis exited the screen and powered the computer off without waiting for Dirk's reply. She knew there was more excitement left in the game, but she needed time to think about her next step. The game was drawing to a close.

Mavis waited for Henry to leave before she arose the next morning. She paused at his study door and tapped gently. She waited. Nothing. She knocked harder. Silence. She opened the door and looked in. Henry was nowhere to be found. Both his briefcase and laptop were gone as well. Satisfied that once again she had avoided any unnecessary conversation, she poured herself a cup of coffee and went into the den to log onto the computer. She wasn't prepared to carry her ruse further. As she had tried to fall asleep the evening before, she found that even the suggestion of someone's murder was distasteful. It was time to call the game.

Her plan from the beginning had been to log on early in the day when Dirk wasn't available and leave a note ending their relationship. It would be devastating-or so she hoped.

"Precious, is that you?"

Mavis was stunned. Dirk wasn't supposed to be in their room until later that evening. She quickly clicked the mouse key and closed the screen. Two cigarettes later she again logged into the private room.

Dirk was waiting.

"I saw you enter the room. Why didn't you answer me? I'm so excited. I've thought it over. God knows I've tried to love her. All I asked was for her to love me back. And all I got was silence. But that's over now. Soon we can be together. I tried. I really did."

"What do you mean?"

Mavis' hands were shaking.

"Precious, I know I'm ready now. My wife will no longer be an obstacle to my desire to love and be loved. I'm going to do as we've planned. I'm going to kill my wife."

Mavis was frantic. She pounded the keyboard over and over again sending messages that went unanswered. Dirk had logged out of the room. In her desperation of entering conflicting commands, her computer screen froze. She sank back into her chair. Something was wrong. Something was terribly wrong. Had Dirk actually believed her? Had she been so convincing that she had driven someone to murder? It was a game, for godsakes-a game gone terribly wrong.


When Mavis turned from the non-responsive screen, Henry was standing in the doorway holding his laptop computer in his left hand, an automobile modem wire dangling from the side portal. In his right hand he held a nine-millimeter semiautomatic.
"Henry, wha…what are you doing with that gun?" Mavis shrieked.

"My dear, Mavis, it's quite simple. I gave you every chance to let me love you. And that's the sad part-I do love you. But I need to be loved as well. Is that so much to ask? To be loved?" He sighed deeply, almost apologetically, and then he added, "I've met someone else, someone who makes me feel special. Someone who makes me feel loved."

In spite of the gun, Mavis couldn't help but laugh. "I don't believe you. Who would be interested in a loser like you? Now put that thing away before you hurt somebody."

Henry's eyes narrowed with anger as he raised the nine-millimeter and aimed it directly at his laughing wife. His hand was steady. Suddenly, a smile softened his face. "Good-bye, my dear," he whispered.

Just before he pulled the trigger, Mavis' laughter turned to stunned silence as he added, "Oh, yes. I almost forgot. She couldn't be here with me, but…Precious sends her love."